Sunday, February 18, 2007

Briefcase



my briefcase in a pile of objects destined for the Salvation Army
When I graduated from college, my grandfather insisted I have a briefcase. His gift was incredibly sweet and thoughtful but I never had much use for a briefcase, especially such a traditional style. I kept the briefcase for a few years, but when I was getting ready to move from California to Boston, the briefcase joined the garage-sized pile of other objects I had to trash, sell, or give away. The briefcase was donated, among many other things, to the Salvation Army, where I hoped it would make its way to someone who would actually have use for it. That was almost two years ago. My grandfather died recently and all I can think about is that briefcase.

I'm interested in the irrational affection we feel towards inanimate objects as well as the narrative and meaning that get attached to this otherwise mundane stuff over time, thanks to who we got the object from, or who we were with when we purchased or found it, what our life was like at the time, what it's like now, and where we've been in between, all of which is carried on in the object, regardless of whether it still exists or not. Creating a virtual memorial for my lost briefcase is the least I can do to honor my grandfather's gift, while, to some extent, confessing my guilt over getting rid of it.

Last seen August, 2005, in Oakland, California

Becky writes from Boston, where she spends a lot of time mulling over the way we deal with memory, loss, technology, and community.

1 comment:

earthchick said...

What a great idea for a project!

I have been exploring similar feelings of loss and grief over letting go of inanimate objects in my Seven Things Project, a personal project devoted to letting to of seven things a week (because I know I have too many things, partly b/c I get so emotionally attached). I started the project with the idea that if I could pay tribute to certain items, maybe I could let them go more easily. But the grief over certain things is really strong.

I'm sorry for the loss of you grandfather, and how the loss of his briefcase keeps haunting you.